Shocking way's to overcome failure.
Failure could be daunting, but there are ways you could bounce back from a significant defeat. I am pretty sure everyone has experienced loss at some point in their lives, and we all know that the feeling of failure could be destructive to some level. Barely making the pass mark in an examination, watching your business crash, getting fired from a job or even not being called back at that job you applied for. When we experience failure, many other feelings come alongside failure; pain, loss of self-esteem, and demotivation. The most challenging part of failing is picking yourself up after being kicked in the balls by failure. But we can’t let failure restrict and limit us; we need to learn how to brush it off our shoulders, move on and live a more fulfilling life. The most courageous thing you could do after experiencing failure is learning from it and moving on. It might seem complicated, but trust me, it is all worth it in the end.
KEEP GOING:
As the Winston Churchill saying goes, “if you’re going through hell, keep going.” Working through and coming out the other side of a (perceived) failure gives you the valuable element of perspective. By then you’ll be more resilient, more resourceful, and ready for your next stage.
“Regardless of the type of failure you’ve had, recognise that you have been through a traumatic event and there’s a grieving process to follow,” said Perry, who added there isn’t a right or wrong way to go through failure, but recommends that you lean into your feelings to work out what they are telling you. “You might feel ready to bounce-back quicker than you expected, but first take a step back and process what’s happened.”
DON’T BEAT YOURSELF UP TOO LONG:
Resilient people who bounce back from their failures, do so because they don’t live in that state of defeatism for too long. Yes, they allow themselves to feel the hurt associated with failure. They don’t escape from it. But they also don’t stay there for too long. While it’s easy to allow resentments and guilt to overcome you on the best of days, you can’t constantly continue to do that. The true hallmark of persistence and resilience is not allowing the pain of failure to last forever. When Thomas Edison was attempting to create a commercially-viable electric lightbulb, and he famously failed over 10,000 times, he didn’t live in that state of failure forever. If he did, he likely wouldn’t have achieved the wild successes that he achieved. In fact, Edison, when asked about his failure, stated: “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
How do many of us react after failing just one time? How about after failing 2 or 3 times? And what about a dozen times? Don’t live in failure. Instead, move on. Use the failure to fuel you and drive you to reach new understandings and ultimately find ways for achieving your goals.
DEVELOP A PLAN FOR MOVING FORWARD:
Nothing changes if nothing changes. Harsh, I know, but once you’ve spent time reflecting on what happened and what you can learn from it, there’s no sense in wallowing in the past. Instead, start developing a plan.
To start, ask yourself the following questions: How will I approach my goals differently knowing what I know now? What kind of support do I need that I didn’t have before? How can I avoid the things that interrupted my progress the first time around? Next, think about ways that you can hold yourself accountable: scheduling check-ins with yourself on your calendar, telling a friend about your plan, or keeping a log. Now, write down your new plan, including as much or as little detail as you need. This could look like a written step-by-step plan with check-in points, a refreshed vision board, or an intention stuck to your mirror to remind yourself what you need to do every day for your goals. It doesn’t really matter if it’s written down or in your head. All that matters is that you do what works best for you—otherwise, you will find yourself in the same situation as before.
TAKE SMALL STEPS TOWARD YOUR GOAL:
You might feel like you’re behind because you’re starting over on your goals or pivoting your plans altogether. That is normal, but the reality is that you’re not behind and you don’t need to rush; everything happens in its own time. So don’t go overscheduling yourself to death trying to “catch up,” and instead, set your eyes on the small steps you need to take in order to yield big results. For example, if you wanted to start working out more but “fell off the wagon,” it doesn’t do you any good to go to the gym twice a day for two hours each to make up for lost time. Start small and commit to 2-3 days a week for 30 minutes, and when you can stick to that, then you can adjust your workout routine. Going in too hard too fast can lead to burnout, and that is what we want to avoid if we are trying to make long-term changes for the better and avoid failure.